i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?