I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
