I love having hate sex.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Randomize
