How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
