do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
True strength comes from lack of pants
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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