Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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