do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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