Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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