brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
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