It's like God shit irony all over that family
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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