how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
