question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
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