I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
