Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
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I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
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Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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