She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
