I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
she told me i tasted like america
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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