I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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