I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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