May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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