if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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