found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
