the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
