no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
