It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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