well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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