this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Randomize
