We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
