Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
