we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Randomize
