No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Who died my cat blue again?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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