All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
