So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
