pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm at about main and main street
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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