I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
