i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
