Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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