I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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