I like to think it a success when the cops are called
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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