on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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