I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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