As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
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