Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
