and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
