I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
