Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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