Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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