its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
it was like eating out sand paper
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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