are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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