My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
