They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
are you so shy because you have an std?
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize