You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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